Sunday 31 August 2008

Study Leave

Wine Goose is officially a student. Add that to my other titles and suddenly "I'm a housewife, I'm a mother, I'm a student." Back in the last century, before we were all 'worth it' Jerry Hall made a fortune from a similar pronunciation. Except that her case the line ran "I'm a housewife, I'm a mother, I'm a model" Lucrative, but surely not as challenging as attempting to achieve the WSET Level 3 Advanced Certificate in Wines and Spirits.

According to the Wine & Spirit Education Trust (WSET), the qualification objective is to provide a core knowledge of the wide range of wines and spirits around the world to equip those in a supervisory capacity with the authority and confidence to make informed decisions in a wide variety of trade situations. It is intended for people employed in the drinks and hospitality industries needing core information to advise with authority and make informed selections of wines and spirits; and also wine connoisseurs who wish to learn about wines and spirits in a rigorous and structured manner and gain an internationally recognised wine and spirit qualification.

Wine Goose considers that because of her part-time work in a Wine Shop she will have a considerable advantage over her fellow students and strolls confidently into the musty hotel conference room for the first lecture. Tonight's topic is broadly titled 'Winemaking', and deals with grape varieties, climate and weather, soils and topography, viticulture, vinification, maturation and bottling. She arrives early - there is more to an evening class to just studying and Wine Goose is keen to suss out her fellow students from an advantageous position at the back of the class. Predictably they are a mix of male and female, young and old, big and small; drawn from all walks of life and all keen to further their knowledge or keep their brains operational until time takes its inevitable toll and the process of forgetting everything ever learnt begins to take place. Wine Goose has a foot in both camps.

Very soon it becomes clear that this is not going to be easy. Various methods of training and pruning vines are presented, along with reasons for and against using them in particular wine regions, all of which we are expected to remember. Well I might have some chance if the presentation wasn't immediately followed by complicated diagrams of the fermentation process. My brain, by which I mean the small part that didn't turn to mush immediately following the birth of my first child, is filled to bursting point but there's more to come - vineyard pests and diseases. Carry this lecture on for an hour longer and the course can change its name to 'Cures for Insomnia'. Wine Goose glances around her in desperation - but all eyes are fully focused on the lecturer and what he has to say. Panic sets in, and Wine Goose considers fleeing. Surely at this early stage she can escape unnoticed. But then a reprieve - it's tasting time. Each student places 6 ISO tasting glasses on his or her desk and is served a small amount of 6 mystery wines. The exam itself will consist of 3 units - a multiple choice paper of 50 questions, a question paper requiring short written answers and (terrifyingly) an internally set and assessed blind tasting of one wine. We will be required to judge its appearance, aroma and flavour characteristics, then attempt to name it from a list of 4 possibles, as well as give it a retail price.

Help. I suddenly consider that perhaps I have been too ambitious and should really stick to flower arranging or French conversation classes. One hour, and lots of swirling and spitting later, Wine Goose concludes that she is actually quite good at picking up aroma and flavour characteristics, but needs to work on assessing tannin and acidity levels. It's a starting point, and she resolves to work on these weak points during the coming week. The lecturer sends everybody home with a clear message that they should read and absorb the chapter on French wine regions and wine laws by the following week. My heart sinks with the realisation that I am really up against it - my initial advantage has been completely wiped out. It is the summer holidays and Wine Goose devotes 12-14 hours of each day to pandering to the children's requirements. This does not leave much time for reading, much less retaining, any information.

But Wine Goose does not give up easily and continues to attend the lectures each week, hoping to absorb the necessary information to pass the exam (ambitions of achieving a Distinction have now been abandoned). And no more blogs until that exam is over. For a delicious summer dessert requiring minimum preparation simply pour some Pedro Ximinez sherry over a bowl of HB vanilla ice cream. Made entirely from Pedro Ximenez grapes that have been allowed to dry for two weeks in the sun after the harvest, this sherry is deep golden brown color, rich, sweet, and full bodied. It has an aroma of caramel and roasted nuts with a buttery, creamy richness on the palate and a luxuriously long finish. Good value at €12.50 for a half bottle (37.5 l), 17% alcohol.