Friday 20 February 2009

Broken Radiator

It is the room that is euphemistically referred to as The Study. It contains an overloaded bookcase, an overstuffed armchair, and the outdated desktop computer from which Wine Goose publishes her musings. Just as the country faces into its worst winter in 21 years, the radiator in this vital hub packs up, with disastrous consequences for all the family.

Mr R reacts by relocating the overstuffed armchair to the Family Room. For him, no more quiet literature-filled evenings, instead he is forced to deal with the reality that is The X Factor, Strictly Come Dancing, and the Disney Channel. The consequences for the children are surely dire, but have yet to be assessed - check back in 20 or 30 years. Wine Goose, being of a practical nature, sees this as a multi-step process.

The first option is denial. Yes, it is possible to check emails while still dressed as the Eskimo that walked the children to school. But the novelty soon wears off, accelerated by the quick glimpse of yet another 'For Sale' sign being erected across the street. DIY is the next step, and armed only with pliers, accompanied by a bucket-bearing enthusiastic son she finally succeeds in opening the vent. Result. Horrible black oily smelly liquid is sprayed all over the previously pristine cream walls. Still no heat. Time to call in the professionals. A highly-recommended plumber charges a fortune to turn some valves, scratch his head, and walk away with a handsome fee. The Study remains a no go zone and Wine Goose, in desperation, decides that there is no other option but to open her wallet and throw all her money at the problem. Sort of a metaphor for our times.

Difficult to recommend a wine in the current climate - instead try saving some money by drinking Ribena or Miwadi, you'll get all the fruit flavours but none of the alcohol, and at a vastly reduced price.