George Li

Okay, so here's where we're at. It's the 21st century in Dublin, Ireland. We are part of the generation that have put in the years at university to become the most educated workforce in Europe. We then go on to build up our careers, taking a few weeks off to get married before returning to the treadmill, when suddenly the arrival of babies halts us in our tracks.

We bask in the glory of Ireland's economic success by forking out more money than is sensible on a house. Some of choose to juggle (awful word, sounds like the children are being tossed around in the air as the mother rushes for a bus), while others, Wine Goose amongst their numbers give into exhaustion and opt to stay home. Either way it's a long day. The nappy changers regularly fantasise about their days in the world of corporate banking, complete with lunch break, and vice verse.

Whatever our choice, it is surely inevitable that at the end of another tiring day we all slump on the couch praying that the little darlings will keep their eyes and mouths tightly shut for 10 hours. And how does the national broadcaster reward us? After catching the last few minutes of Fair City (more than enough to keep up to date with the storyline I assure you), the gap before the 9 o'Clock News is filled with such rubbish that one wonders if RTE exists in a bubble. If it's Monday night it's got to be 'Life Without Me'. Intriguing title. Something to do with bereavement perhaps. But no, in this misjudged attempt at entertainment, a person is 'removed' from their family for a week, and we the viewer gets to see to how everybody else in their lives copes. Surely fascinating for the immediate family and a few neighbours in the village that time forgot, but hardly compulsive viewing for the most sophisticated workforce in Europe. 'Househunters in the Sun Revisited' - it must be Tuesday. Missed it the first time around, thankfully. Don't intend to revisit. And on it goes, insult added to injury - Diarmuid's Pony Kids (well Dermo did well in the Chelsea Flower Show, he's bound to succeed on de telly). No lessons learned from Anna Nolan then were there?

Nine o'clock, blessed relief. Our News. The interchangeable blond (sometimes a fringe, sometimes not) recounts the days events with a carefully modulated grown-up DART accent, expressing the same level of interest in a major nuclear disaster as in a midlands turf cutting competition.

But watch carefully, she does break into a small smile as she introduces the devilishly handsome Economics Correspondent, George. A major beneficiary of the country's success he encapsulates all that we are (square jaw, square glasses, expensive suit, flash car probably). He started off with a small slot on part 2, but right now he's competing with the Health Correspondent for top billing. This is no surprise to regular news watchers, Wine Goose included,who will surely have noted the man's ambition and how much more he seems to be enjoying the job nowadays. The transition started slowly - perhaps interjecting a curve once a week - a small factory in an obscure location closing down or a leader in a far off land making a decision that had a potentially disastrous impact for Ireland. Gradually he has grown in confidence and his screen time has increased exponentially as he brings us even more devastating economic news - spiralling interest rates, more closedowns, GDP and GNP (whatever they are) revised downwards. His excitement grows. He is on a roll. Property is no longer where it's at. Every report is prefaced with 'devastating' or 'has disastrous consequences'. The further the country sinks into economic doldrums the more excited he becomes. George Li is clearly a communist.

Can't afford to buy that sublime bottle of Ata Rangi Crimson Pinot Noir (€27.00). Don't blame Bertie, blame RTE.